In the wake of his spoon-footed performance in the Sunburned Zebras' opening game, the team's inspirational playmaker Freemisco has been rewarded with a new footwear deal.
Freemisco - the man who made several goals for the opposition with his rapist's touch and clueless positional sense - has signed a deal to wear clogs.
The wooden shoes are not expected to slow Freemisco down in any way and it is hoped that the curved nature of the footwear will help compensate for his natural inability to kick the ball accurately.
Freemisco's clogs have been decorated with a special design - after all, he is the Special One.
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